Indeed, it has been a long time since a blog post, so I thought it time that these vents (basically) become more regular. This time I want to talk about the annoyance of quotes and the world saying things that sometimes, you feel trapped because you feel you can’t do them.
“let the dream die”
This first quote is from a vlog from Youtuber Katilette’s vlog she made a few months ago (if you want to watch: here). The quote above is from an audiobook she was listening to and it has resonated with me ever since. You see I’ve wanted to travel since I was young but always felt I needed lots of money to do it (Instagrammers have since said you don’t). I also want to go back to school and with my city (like many) in the grips of a housing shortage, I would be living at home while doing this. So, there is my confusion, do I let the “dream” of travelling go? I don’t. The “dream” of living in my city? Perhaps. The commute alone would be too much for me, so do I go away? That might be it. But travel, I’m not sure I can give that up. That is something I need to do to ensure I have seen a least a small part of the world. No, the “dream” that is dying is living in my beloved home city to find a better price of living. That and writing is something I need too, it is my therapy, to feel a whole human being.
“… I swear I lived”
I hope you’ve heard of OneRepublic, because this next spiel is all about OneRepublic’s “I Lived” (watch here, if you haven’t). The reason I used this line is because if you have experienced loss, you are super aware that your time on this planet is a) what you make of it and b)who knows when it is taken away. So, you begin to think about your life. Everyone, of course, has different priorities in their lives. For me, living a fulfilled life means I travel to the places I dream about and also writing the books on topics I am passionate about (I have three in the pipeline). I know, this is rather morbid, but shouldn’t we be doing more of what we love? I struggle with the concept some days, I do. I think, there is no WAY I am getting out of my housing situation, maybe I am a typical millennial or should I be better settling for something? But every fiber in my being tells me that when I reach the age of my grandparents, I need to be able to swear to my grandchildren and my children that I lived. I lived happily because I did more of the things I wanted to do.
But how do I do all this?
I guess, like me, you’ll have to stick around and find out in my next post which will be the first and last Friday every month (yes, I know it isn’t the last Friday in a month!).